Wednesday, March 16, 2016

Listening's hard. So is selling stuff. Wait- no... No, it's actually super easy.

Listening.

Are you?

Listening?

Probably not. That's my experience, at least. Most people outside of a few select groups in which I travel do not listen to anything - ANYTHING - that they are presented with, but rather choose to make an assumption about the direction a conversation is going and answer whatever question they assume is the one being asked, regardless of what is actually being asked of them.

Here's my newest example and the reason I won't be rejoining 24 Hour Fitness.

His name is Patrick. He's a Sales Associate (an "SA" if you are one of 24's minions). And he does not listen.

I knew I was going into this conversation with a limited amount of time, so I had my script prepared.

"Hi. I completely cancelled my membership almost a year ago. I recently got an email from you all stating I could get a month free and 25% off my initiation fee if I re-started my membership before April 1st. I'd like to talk to someone about getting a trial pass for three days so I can try out this location at a few different times of day to make sure this is a good fit and I'll be able to do what I need to do here. Can you help me with that?"

The front desk monkey said she'd find me someone. To the new person, I said:

"Hi. I completely cancelled my membership almost a year ago. I recently got an email from you all stating I could get a month free and 25% off my initiation fee if I re-started my membership before April 1st. I'd like to talk to someone about getting a trial pass for three days so I can try out this location at a few different times of day to make sure this is a good fit and I'll be able to do what I need to do here. Can you help me with that?"

That person, the one she found me, said he'd find me someone.

(Spoiler alert, this is when we meet Patrick.)

Patrick comes out and walks with me to a membership-creating computer station. He insists I begin the process, I acquiesce all the while saying - shockingly:

"Hi. I completely cancelled my membership almost a year ago. I recently got an email from you all stating I could get a month free and 25% off my initiation fee if I re-started my membership before April 1st. I'd like to talk to someone about getting a trial pass for three days so I can try out this location at a few different times of day to make sure this is a good fit and I'll be able to do what I need to do here. Can you help me with that?"

He says "so let's get you signed up with a membership."

I say something like, "No. I'd like to get some kind of a three day trial pass to make sure that this gym will work for my needs."

"Well, we can't do that since you've already been a member in the past. Were you a member at this location?"

"No, at the Koreatown location. And it was awful. Have you been there?"

"Well, we can't do a pass for you since you've been a member."

"...Then I guess I won't be getting a membership."

[I remove my hands from the sign-up keyboard like it's snakes.]

"Let's just get you signed up, though, because you'll still have a 24 hour period to cancel."

"24 hours isn't enough. I have 10 minutes right now to get this pass figured out. That's why I'm asking for three days to assess whether this gym will work for my needs. I assumed this conversation would take a while, which it is, so since I won't be able to fully determine if I can use this gym for what I need in the span of 24 hours, and that's all you can give me, I won't be signing up."

"You can use the gym right now if you sign up."

"Okay... Again. Patrick. I need to leave in now... eight minutes. I don't have time. I need longer than 24 hours to figure out if this gym will work for me. So no, I won't be signing up."

"Well, you have 24 hours to cancel. It only takes 2 minutes to get you signed up."

"I. Don't. Have. Time. To. Work. Out. Today."

"Well, you should get signed up now because this deal ends tomorrow."

"What? No it doesn't. Today is the 16th. This deal that I am staring at, the one in my inbox, ends the 1st."

"No the other intro deal I'm signing you up for."

"What are you even talking about."

"It's a discounted initiation fee if you sign up before St. Patrick's day tomorrow."

"Then if I have time tomorrow, I'll come back tomorrow so I can actually utilize the 24 hour window I'd be allotted to determine if this gym is useable for me."

"It only takes 2 minutes to sign up right now."

"That's lovely, and, that's all the time I have left and now I need to leave."

"You'd have three days to decide if you want to cancel; penalty-free."

"... ... ... You said I'd have 24 hours."

"That's what I tell people because they forget to cancel and then want to get a refund so I tell them they have 24 hours."

"So do people have 24 hours or 3 days?"

"3 days."

"Because you told me 24 hours."

"I tell people that so they they understand the urgency. So let's get you signed up."

"Wow. Okay. You're not listening which is making me doubt my choice to come back here at all. I need to leave. Goodbye."

"Okay, see you tomorrow. I'm Patrick."

"... Yes. I know. We covered that."

" *expectant smile* "

"I'm still Andrew."

"See you tomorrow, Andrew."

"No, Patrick, you won't."

Let's break this down.

Step 1: Listen!
Patrick did not listen. Had Patrick listened, he would have heard that I, repeatedly, expressed that I am concerned my fitness needs, my equipment needs, my spacial needs, would not be met by this particular location. However he did not ONCE, nor did anyone else even ONCE, ask me what those needs are. No one said, "do you want to see the space now to see if we have what you need?" He didn't seek to understand what those pesky needs of mine were. He wanted his commission and I could smell it on him a mile away. He reeked of desperation and hardball strong-arm sales techniques with absolutely zero attention paid to his customer's needs or concerns. That's called manipulation and bullying, not sales. I don't workout with (or buy from) bullies.

Step 2: Tell the damn truth.
Patrick did not tell the truth. If you lie to me, I will not buy your product. Period. That is false advertising and it is disrespectful. And on an even subtler level than that, had Patrick been listening instead of waiting for his opportunity to strong-arm me into a sale again, he would have heard that I came in asking for one thing: a three-day pass to check out the facility and see if it would work for my needs. Had he told the truth from the beginning, had he said simply, "I understand you need a few days to figure out if this is a good fit. I'd love to get you signed up so you can use the three-day, no-hassle, no-strings-attached cancellation policy in lieu of a guest pass. Since, by policy, I can't grant you a pass because you've had a membership before, that would be a way for you to get a free trial run for three days. Just make sure that you do cancel the membership before those three days are up if you do decide this is not the right fit."

THAT WOULD HAVE SOLVED THE PROBLEM.

I would have signed up right then and there, happy as a clam, spent my remaining seven-and-a-half minutes bench pressing, and gone back tomorrow to do a 2 hour set. Patrick would have gotten his commission. Everyone would have been happy.

But instead, Patrick lied. He tried to manipulate me. He tried to trick me; to con me. So, no, problem not solved, Patrick. Problem not solved.

Step 3: Empathize, children.
Had Patrick tried empathizing with his customer - me - he would have noticed that I was deeply concerned about coming back to 24 hour fitness. I mentioned to him repeatedly that I had a horrible experience working out at the Koreatown location. But did he ask why? Did he ask what was problematic for me? Nope. He just repeated his script about getting me signed up. What did Patrick care about? Patrick. And Patrick's commission. And that's all.

Moral of the story?

If you are in a sales position, if you are trying to sell stuff to people, LISTEN. He probably could have convinced me to make the choice to just go ahead and sign up today had he come at it from the angle of "what was the experience at K-town that made you cancel your membership?" and "You can get those three days you need at the top of a new membership and cancel penalty-free if it doesn't work out for you." But alas, Patrick did none of those things. And alas, I still have no place to work out. So that, dear readers, is called a "lose-lose."

Patrick, I hope your boss reads this. For the sake of every other person who walks through those doors and is bombarded by your complete lack of empathy and manipulative attitude.

Listen.

No comments:

Post a Comment